Addiction is like a chain reaction. It is a disease that affects the user and their family members, friends and coworkers. I tried to control, cover-up, and take on the responsibilities for the addict. The addict‘s illness affects me because I care for her and love her. Eventually I feel used and unhappy. I worry, lose trust, and become angry. The addict blames others, and me, and tries to make me feel guilty. If only I could change something.
When I discovered Nar Anon, I found other people with the same feelings and problems I was experiencing. I learned that I cannot control the addict. I cannot change her, or anyone else but me. I became so addicted to the addict that it was difficult to shift the focus back on myself. I found that first I must admit that I am powerless. I must put my faith in my Higher Power to begin my journey and release the addict with love and cease trying to change her. By working the 12 steps, following the traditions, and using the tools of my normal program, I find that I can receive the grace to release the addict with love.
Thought for today: I can help stop the chain reaction of addiction by breaking the chain. I will no longer be a link that supports the disease of addiction.
“ The most important thing is to learn which interactions are distractive and which might be creative and then have the courage to attempt a creative approach. The change must begin with the non user. The drug dependent person will not seek help and recovery as long as her immature needs are met and her problems solved by her family and friends.” – A Guide for the Family of the Addict and Drug Abuser